Friday, 13 September 2013

Ek Laddu Aur !!

The other day, my brother and I were reminiscing about our childhood and recalling all the cheekiest mischiefs that we did together. And one incident that instantly cracked us up was when we stole Laddoos from our Grand Ma’s Almirah in an incredibly filmy style. With the help of my brother, I have created an interesting story about this whole incident. Let me introduce you to the lead characters: Nexy, that’s me, Pony, my brother Rahul, and Amma, our late Daadi. If you would like to take a plunge in to the dreamy world of Nexy and Pony, then you can either browse through : chalkuchkheltehain  or read the following short stories on Jhumore.com.

http://www.jhumore.com/search/label/Gulaab%20Jamun

Ye baat un dino ki hai jab safed chaddaron ki jagah makhmali kambalo ne le li thi, sooraj dada thode alsi ho aye the, aur aas paas ke maidano me raam leela ki tayyariyan joron shoron se ho rahin  thin. Jee han ye waqt tha Dusheera ka jab sardiyan dheere dheere garmiyon ko vida kar rahin thin aur Dilli ke har kooche kaune pe baithi antiyan naye naye sweaters ki designs dicuss karna shuru kar detin thin. Aise mein Nexy aur Pony ki mummy apne pyaare bachchon ko thand ke prakop se bachaane ke liye ghee aur mawa ke mote mote “aate ke laddu” banana pasand karti thin. “Beta ek gilas garam doodh ke sath ek laddu khalo, thand aas paas bhe nahi phatkegi”. Par ek laddu se hamara kya hoga ??…lalchaye mann se Nexy aur Pony ladduon se bhare bade kaanch ke imartban ke taraf dekhte hue socha karte . Kaash woh ek laddoo aur mang sakte ?? Par ye to namumkin se bhi pare tha. Ladduon ka dibba unki Amma ki badi lakdi ki almaari mein chup chaap baitha rehta tha. Shaam ko jab mummy doodh ka glass Nexy aur Pony ko deti thin, tabhi us dabbe ke darshan hote. “Ek laddo tu le ri Nexy aur ek ladoo Pony tero”…aur Amma phir poori sawdhani ke sath us dabbe ko almari me chupa detin. Par Nexy aur Pony ka dil us dabbe ko dur jaate dekh jal jaata tha.



Akhir ek din Nexy aur Pony  ne apna maun toda aur Amma se ek aur ladoo mang hi baithe….”Amma..ooo Amma.. hamare laddoo na  bahut chote hain..ek aur do warna doodh nahi khatm kar payenge”…roni se surat banakar dono ne Amma ko guhaar lagayi…Par Amma sab jaanti thin…Amma ne unhe ansuna karte hue dabbe ko almari mei rakha aur almari par taala ainth diya. Chaabi ka guccha apni kamar par latka kar Amma bahar ki aur kooch kar gayin. Bechare Nexy aur Pony muh latkaye reh gaye. Par ab bahut ho chuka tha. Aakhir Nexy aur Pony kab tak ye bardasht karte. Dono chup chaap store room mein jakar baith gaye jahan ghup andhere ke siwaye bas kooda kabada basta tha..aur apne dimag ke ghodon ko bina lagaam ke daudana shuru kiya…”Pony idea !! ..dekh agar tu kisi se nahi bole to…arey Nexy jaan de dunga par kisi ko nahi bataunga..ab bata bhi”..Nexy lapak kar Pony ka kaan apni aur kheecha….jaise jaise Nexy ne apne plan ke pench Pony ko kholne shuru kiye..waise waise Pony ki muskaan jordar hansi mein tabdil hoti gayi…”bhai waah..!!” pony chehak kar bola.


Agle din school se akar Nexy aur Pony ne apne plan ka shree ganesh kiya.. Dopahar ke kareeban dhai baje the. Sooraj dada badlon ke peeche uungh rahe the aur Nexy Pony ki Amma bhi varande mein pade bade thakhat par gehri neend so rahin thi. Dabe paaon se Nexy aur Pony varande ki taraf badhe..aur takhat ke neeche chup chaap baith gaye…”Nexy chaabi kamar ke daayin taraf hai par Amma to bayin taraf karke so rahi hain..Ab kya karein ??” Pony nirash hote hue bola…par Nexy ne use dilaasa dilaya aur dono phir Amma ke karvat lene ka intzaar karne lage. Jaise hi takhat se chiiram churram ki Awaaz hui..Nexy aur poni ke kaan khade ho gaye..aur chehron par alag si chamak a gayi…Pony ne chupke se sar bahar nikal kar Amma ki karbat ka jaayza liyaaa..aur apni khushin ko batorte hue thakat ke neeche baithi Nexy tak ye khabar pahunchayi..”behan Amma karbat kha gayiinn!! Chaabi saamne hi hai…!!! Bas phir kya tha Nexy dheere dheere takhat ke neeche se bahar nikli aur Amma ki kamar se kasi chaabi ko halke halke kheencha shuru kiya…Nexy aur Pony apne hath mein chaabi paakar chatth ki taraf bhaagae. Unki khushi ka koi thikhaana he na tha …. Aub aagae kya kiya jaaye ????? ..chaabi toh haath lag gaye lekin Amma ko uthna kae baad chaabi na mili toh kohraam mach jayegaa …

Aub yahan kahani mein ek kirdaaar aur aata hae jo ki un dinon unke aangan mein dera jamaye hue tha. Ye the Miyaan Rajuddin, jo Nexy aur Pony ke gaanv ke akele Badhai the (Carpenter) . Pyaar se Nexy aur Pony unhe chaacha bulaya karte the. Pony Rajuddin se bas isliyeh bana kar rakhta tha kyunki uske pass ATLAS GOLDLINE SUPER thie  jisse Pony krenchi chalaya karta tha…Wapas gaanv janae se pehlae jub rajuddin apni cycle mein taala laga diya karta tha toh uski iss galti ka saara gussa uski cycle ko jhelna padta tha .. Pony uski cycle ka taala uskae he auzaaron se toda karta tha jaise..Aaari ..Hathodi. ..etc Toh chalo wapas kahaaani mein entry maarte hain…jub chatth par chaabi paanae ki khushi manai ja rahe thie toh dimaag mein sawaal ye bhe tha ki aub kiya kya jaaye????? Saare ladddu ek baar mein gayab kar liyeh jaeein ???? ye dheere dheere unka mazza liya jaye ?

Iss baar Pony ke dimaag mein ek visfot hua jisne ek bahut ki kaamal ki tarkib ko janam diya…”Nexy kyon na chaabi ko ek saabun pe chaaap laein aur phir baazar se bilkul aisse he chaabi banwayi jaye” …. Nexy ko duplicate chaabi ka idea pasand to aaya lekin sabun pe chaaap ke bazaar jakae aissa chaabi banawana sahe nahe lag raha tha… dimaag chahein jitna bhe tezz chalta tha dono ka par thae toh dauno bacchae he... "agar baazaar mein aisse sabun pe chaabi ka chaap laekar gaye toh chaabi wala bhe shak karega"... is bat ko dhyan mein rakhte hue Nexy ne us idea ko drop kar diya…..  Pony ko Nexy ke idea namanzur karne par bahut gussa aaya aur usse uski teesri aankh khul gaye aur phir dimaag mein ek aur toofani idea aaya. Usne socha kyon na Rajudddin kae auzaron ka boraaa nikaala jaye ..”thodi thok peeet karkae hum bhe chaabi bana he lingae..kyun Nexy?” … Pony ka ye shujhaav Nexy nae pass kiya aur Rajuddin ke auzaaron ka bora dhoonda gaya …bora miltae he ussae upar chatth par le jakar  palat diya gaya aur aisse auzaar chunae gaye jo unkae kaam mein madadgaar saabit ho sakein..


Tabhi Pony ki nazar ek aise auzaar par padi jissse woh Rajudddin ko lakdi aur lohae ko ghistae hue dekha karta tha …us karamaati hathiyaar ko MISSION poora karnae kae liyeh chun liya gaya “Nexy jaaa dossrae kamrae ki almari ki ek chaabi nikaal la jiski do latak rahe hein hain …tod la ek…. Nexy bhe naarad munni ki tarah DHANNN se gaye aur DHANN se wapas aagaye.. “
Pony nae dauno chaabiyon ko match kiya aur dossrae kamrae ki chaabi ko ghisna shuru kiyaa … Aur us chaabi ki tab tak ghisayi ki gayi jab tak wah amma ki almaari ki chaabi jaisi nahi lagne lagi …beech beech mein Pony baar baar Amma kae kamre mein jata aur usse amma ki almari kholne ki koshish karta.  Chaabi thodi bahut ghoomnae lagi thie..lekin wo CUTTTT ki awaaz nahe aa rahe thie jo ki Amma waali chaabi se aaya karti thie jub almaari khulti thie…isliye chaabi pe thoda aur kaam kiya gaya.

Dis time Pony was confident …”Nexy chal aub toh khul he jayegi … andar se lekin dauno kaafi darae hue thae ki agar ye nakli chaabi atak gaye toh kyaaa hoga ?….. Pony nae pehlae Amma ki chaabi se he alamari  ko khola aur bandh kiya to make sure  taala toh sahe hae na. Phir nakli chaabi lagai gaye …chaabi ki itni ghisaai karne kae baad Pony kae haathon mei itna paseena a chukka tha ki usse chaabi ghunmayi hi nahi ja rahi thi.. … tabhe Nexy boli “abe ye pakad naa  toliya isse ghumaa”…  Pony nae jaisee he chaabi ghumaai aur CUTTTT . 1 min ko dauno ko samajh nahe aaya ki yeh hua kya ????

 CHAABBII taalae ke ander he toot gaye kyaa ? Jub thoda dhyaan diyaa toh dekhaa aaarae!!! kyaa baat hae nexxxy badhaaaiyaaan taaala khul gaya yaar. !!!



Amma Nexy aur Pony ko ek ek laddu dekar chalta karti aur wo dono Amma ke kamar ke peeche se ek ek laddoo aur nikal le jaate..Aur ye silsila aise chalta hi raha .. ek laddu gayab, ek aur laddu gayab, din beetate gaye, laddu dheere dheere gaayab hote rahe jiski wajah se Amma ke dimag mein shak ka keeda paida ho chuka tha..par Amma shikayat karein to kis ki ?..ilzaam lagaye to kis par?..Laddu ka imartban to unki almaari mein kaid tha..to Ladoo gayab kaise ho rahe the???.Is gahari soch mein amaa din raat doobi rehti thi .. 

Ek din Amma se raha na gaya aur Nexy aur Pony se puch hi baithin.”.itaku ao tum dono”..Nexy aur Pony muh paunchte hue Amma ke pass ja baithe..”ek bat batao sach sach bataoge to laddu Milego....ya dibba mein te laddu kaise gayab hai rae hain..!!” Pony uchak le bola..”Amma hume kya pata..hume to tum deti ho ek ek laddu aur taala maar deti ho almari pe”..Nexy ne Pony ki haan mein haan milayi..”han han Amma chaabi to tumhare pass hoti hai”..Amma phir soch mein pad gayin.. “Amma ho sakta hai chuhe kha rahe hon..aj kal bahut dikh rahe hain”. 

Ab Amma kartin bhi to kya kartin..bolin “haan hai to sake..mene kal hi dekho ek apne kamra mein par agar chuhe kha rahe hain to wo dhakkan kaise lagawe hain dibba pe”..Pony ne phir chuhe ki taraf se safaai di..”ho sakta hai na tum hi dibbe ka dhakkan sahi se na lagatin hon”..Amma gehri saans leti hue bolin “haan je hai sake hai.par mero mann na maan ro..je koi aur hi hai.chalo tum dono ek ek aur ladoo lo..chuhe khayein je ladoo aur mere baalak na khaein..je galat hai” Nexy aur Pony  ne ek doosre ki taraf dekha aur Amma ke gale lag gaye. Is vartalaap se Nexy aur Pony ko itna to pata chal chukka tha ki jis din galti se bhi wo Amma ke changul mein phans gaye, us din khoob sutai hogi..par dil hai ki manta nahi!!!:)…poori sardiyan beent gayin par laduon ka raaz raaz hi reh gaya.. aur ye raaz tha jo pehlae bas Nexy aur Pony ke hi pass tha par aaaj aap subko pata hae..shhhh kisi se kehna mat..!!! :D

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